iCelibate

J: *past minute trying to insert usb charger into iPhone in the dark* Eh, I too long never have sex issit, why cannot find the hole!?

"insanity is not a taurus trait."

A day early.

F: Eh you know I went for my medical checkup right... You know what? I got HIV. FML.

J: It's not April Fools' Day yet.

F: HAHAHAHAHAH HAPPY ADVANCED APRIL FOOLS!

He just wanted McNuggets.

F vs J

i hope i got gay mat

then i ask "are you thirsty. then give him a spiked drink"

AHAHAHAHA

share my hotcakes

WOO hotcakes!

so suggestive

zomg!

nice one

would you like to errr... wash my vegetable?

aiya i dunno la

so difficult

would u like some... maple syrup?

walao you so good

I KNOW

I SHOULD WRITE A BOOK

or would you like to undress my MAcchicken?

HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA

FAUZI

ur pickup lines are epic

i really dunno what? !!!

so difficult sia

haiyoh u need lessons

101 on dirty talking

choose food item

make sure it can be kinky

k k i try chilli

do you think the chilli is wrong? I ORDERED GARLIC CHILLI YOU DUMB ASS. NOT CURRY

is that ur pickup line

i dunno omg

i give up

walao i fail sia. no wonder single

Telling her I felt drunk...

S: Guys eat beansprouts cum will be very thick ah?

A: Really meh? I don't know leh...

(everyone ponders)

A: Yay, K coming back tomorrow!

Self-Explanatory

Strong fingers eh?

Blondes, little girls and MILFs.

S: I like dirty blondes.
J.T: You like your blondes dirty?

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L: Little IJ girl!
J.O: Confirm become lesbian one.
J.T: Yeah, or slut.
J.O: Yeah, maybe she should start now.

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J.O: Oh, L, you like SA girls ah?
S: No, L like all kinds of girls.

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S: Wah, Alessandra...
J.T: Yeah, milf. Siala, they look at the daughters, we look at the moms.

Angelic & Shy.. yeah right.

L: I sound like a man meh?
J: No ah, you just speak very soft lor.
L: OMG you say I speak softly! I'm demure!

Conflict of the Stars

JO: Aries/Taurus how ah? Aries like to play, but Taurus can commit.
JT: Commited to playing lor.

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JO: Then Virgo/Libra leh?
JT: Virgo like to stay home, Libra like to go out. So I go out to N's home lor.

90's were more fun

F: and in primary school, i was the head librarian
i was so garang i tell you

J: wahsay jealous
i alway wanted to chop chop the books

F: YA
chop chop the books
but now scan la girl

J: SHIT

Not if you're full bottom.

*discussing where the hymen is*
W (to 3 lesbians): Aiyah, no need to know where it is lah! Not like we ever have a vagina in our face.
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W: Sorry, I forgot who I was.

Portability

A: Are we going to club? You're coming to my house first right.
J: Yeah, I'll go over then we can decide lor.
A: Then what are you going to wear to my house? You're gonna bring clothes and makeup ah?
J: Aiyah, wear clothes and makeup lor! Bring makeup on my face better than bring all of it out.

Fangirlz

J: *starts singing Yellowcard*
N: Okok a lot of feeling already.
J: What?! It's YELLOWCARD!
N: OH MY GOOOODDDD... YELLOWCARRRRRDDDD.. I used to have all their songs!!!!!

A bad doctor.

At the clinic.

N: I'm going to pull out your dead hairs because I'm bored.
J: -keeps quiet-
N: -pulls-
After the 6th strand...
J: Ouch.
N: Pain ar?
J: YA LAR!
N: Say luh! I thought why you no reaction one.
J: >.<

N: -irritates J-
J: Ok. I know what I'm going to tell the doctor already.
N: What?
J: I'm going to tell him that you're giving me a headache.
N: Oh no! What did the doctor do?!

Sesame Street 2000

louisa i miss sesame strreeet

Vulnerator non vincitur.
HEHEHEHE ME TOO


louisa
ahah i like the purple one!
eh no
that one
macs

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louisa
oooo
got purple one in sesame street also ah. accord to the pic


Vulnerator non vincitur.
HAHAHHHAHHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA
I PHOTOSHOP ONE

Natal Charts

sherleen: ya my moon aquarius :X

me: ur emotions wanna ask alot :x

sherleen: ya true :X

but then i wont ask in the end.

i jus figure it out myself somehw.

me: hahahaa not bad.

sherleen: IS TT TAURUS
DEAL W MYSELF d:

me: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHHHAHAHAH

sherleen: OMG

me: MAYBE OMG

sherleen: make sense now HAHA

oh i gt libra also.

D:

chinchai.. ya i chinchai alot w B sometimes hahahaha.

sherleen: like anyth la.. don wan to bother , bother alr i xin ku. tt... is taurus ?!

OMG

bangs head

me: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

that might be libra also

taurus more of.. i dontcare, i think u dont care also

libra is.. i dont think u care, so i dont want to care.

sherleen: i got both tinkin before

i even tink before... i tink u care so i don wan to care.

me: see which one stronger lor hahahaha

sherleen: let u care more :X

me: HAHAHAH THAT ONE PISCES ALREADY

Basket

J: Ah! So cute! So annoying! I feel like punching it.
N: Now you know how I feel about you.

Don't Forget The Lyrics... & Artiste

J: I was listening to Rachael Yamagata right?
N: What song?
J: Don't.
N: Don't, don't let me be the last to know - For you and for me and the entire human race -
J: Then right...
N: Show me the meaning of being lonely - Lonely, I'm so lonely -
J: ... I was wondering if she was a Virgo.
N: Like a virgin!
J: Hello?
N: Hello there, the angel from my nightmare -
J: Aiyah! Then you know what horoscope is she?
N: Huh? Who?
J: RACHAEL YAMAGATAAAAAAAA! Wahlao, you sing from Britney Spears to Madonna, you dunno who I talking about?!

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N: Hahaha, I seriously didn't know who you were talking about! The last word I heard was "Don't".
J: Yeah, then you went into a 90mins concert.

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N: I think your "RACHAEL YAMAGATAAAAAA!" woke me up. But I was actually quite happy being not sane.